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Living in a Hamster Wheel

Living in a Hamster Wheel

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My name is Melissa and I have a problem……I keep myself WAY too busy!! There I have said it, out loud and online for everyone to read. I like to keep myself busy, but lately it seems I have been riding a hamster wheel that just keeps getting faster and it is really starting to take its toll on me. So when I say I like to keep myself busy, I even mean when I’m trying to relax; for example when I sit down to watch a movie with my husband I have to be doing something to keep my hands busy, whether it is prepping for a card class, putting a stamp set together, writing a post for either my stamping blog or OVM or even knitting…..I need to multi-task! Lately though, I find myself saying, ‘I just need to get through the next weekend, or the next event, and then I can relax’ but that time comes and goes and my down-time has become non-existent! Why do I keep doing this to myself???

I come by this need to be busy honestly…..my Mom, my Nan, my Aunt they are all the same way! Is this a gene that you inherit?? I have a hard time saying ‘No’ and I never want to miss out on a family event or get together with friends, however I am finally realizing (after all these years) that I have to start saying that ‘No’ word, and that I can’t be at every get together. For me this is easier said than done as I normally say this when I hit that wall of exhaustion, lay low for a little while and then start the cycle all over. I am in constant search for balance and how to be better organized and more efficient with my time, and as I start to think of starting a family in the near future it makes me think……how do women do it? How do you spend time with your family, work, see your friends, persue what you are passionate about and ensure you get in some ‘me’ time? Will I be able to do this once children are in the picture when I can’t even do that now? This alone has me scared and questioning my ability to be a Mom as I know I will want to be a hands on parent.

I would love to hear your thoughts…..do you feel like you are living in a hamster wheel? Were you in a similar situation before having kids and how did you manage the transition? Is this a normal fear you had before you started a family? Lastly do you have any tips on how you organize your busy life?

 
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Comments (5)

  1. Louise Thursday - 13 / 09 / 2012 Reply
    The world needs people like you Melissa! People who are SO dedicated to their projects, passionate about life. It inspires your entourage without you noticing! It's who you are. But wait I almost forgot the purpose of this post. I don't have any tip for you but stay focus on the baby creation process and everything will naturally fall into place in your life. I think :)
  2. Melody Lachance Thursday - 13 / 09 / 2012 Reply
    As a contributor to this "gene" pool, I fully understand where you are coming from. Even retired (as you know) I am always busy, and the saying that I have heard so much in the past "I don't know how I worked, and still did all this?" is surely my case. We are just that type, we are happy doing things, even when it tires us out. The biggest tip I can give you, and anyone who feels like this is....if you truly want to do something, you will make the time. If it is something that you can sit back and say "am I the only one who can do this? should I feel guilty if I don't? or can I ask someone to help me? you know this is hardest for me!!! But we just have to ask and people will be there to help. Because they know if they need help, you (we) will be there. As for family, work, and other committments - just remember it is the quality of time you need to concentrate on, and when you need a break TAKE IT....because you have earned it.
  3. Julie MacDougall Friday - 14 / 09 / 2012 Reply
    I think we are all very busy with "things" before we have children, we keep ourselves busy with things because we have time to fill. Once the child(ren) come you will find that some things become less important and will be easier to set aside. Perhaps for a while many things will need to be set aside, some maybe even for a very long while and that's okay, you will have one very important focus to your life. As you get used to being a parent, if the things are really important to you still, you will pick them back up again fairly quickly, there will be new things to do that will fill the place of the old things and some activities you may get back to much, much later when the children are older. But it's all okay, you grow and change and your priorities and activities will change with you, not to worry!
  4. Tricia Saturday - 15 / 09 / 2012 Reply
    Great post Mel! I feel this way sometimes too. Constantly struggling to find balance, find it and lose it again all in a few days. That being said, I decided I needed to prioritize what was important/needed in my life. Once I did that I had to accept that some days those not high on the list wouldn't be touched. I struggle withe the guilt of that some days but know that I am making the right decision in the long run. Do whats best/important to you and your family. Everyone needs some down time :) xo
  5. Tricia Saturday - 15 / 09 / 2012 Reply
    And you will be a great mom. You learn to adapt over time.

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