My Son Wears Headbands, So What?

Babies & Toddlers

by Crystal | on August 22nd, 2012 | 10 comments

My daughter LOVES headbands, almost always has one on. So guess who else likes to wear them? My son. I have a 5 year old daughter and a 17 month old son. His big sister is the world to him! I would almost dare say, a close fave person. So because he looks up to her and loves her so, he watches and imitates her to no end! If he sees her with a pretty, flowery headband on, he wants one too. And, I give him one and let him walk about with it on.

My little chubby, rough and tumble boy also loves to play with Barbies, Princess computer, jewellery, brushes, make up, and ‘read’ my daughters girlie books. Don’t get me wrong, he plays with trucks and tractors. But he also loves his sisters stuff, which is as girlie as it gets.

The thing is, I don’t care. I always thought I would. My daughter loves pink, loves Princesses and fairies, make up and dress up. She is as girlie as it comes. I encouraged her right from the get go as I too, love those things both as a kid and now, and I wanted her to like it as well. When we found out that we were having a boy, I bought construction crib bedding and nursery decor, ‘tough like Daddy’ and rock ’n roll themed clothes and bibs. I wanted the opposite of my daughter, the boys boy like my husband. Don’t get me wrong, I didn’t think there was anything wrong with boys being feminine, but wanted my little man to love tractors and trucks like his Daddy. So I am surprised how much I really don’t care that he likes to play with more female gender oriented toys. I will likely (with my husband shaking his head) be that Mom who paints her sons nails because he sees us doing it and not think twice.

In this day and age, does it really matter if my son likes to wear a headband from time to time? No, I don’t think so. The thing is, he is still so young he doesn’t know what ‘gender orientation’ even is. So what should it matter. Even later on, as he grows, I will let him make the choices of what he wants to wear and play with or do (sports, activities, profession etc). I can only hope that society will have evolved even more than it has already, so that whatever his wishes are as a young adult, they are welcomed and not shunned.

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Karen Wednesday - 22 / 08 / 2012 Reply

Recently I was sitting with my daughter painting our nails as I do quite often as we both LOVE having our nails done. My youngest son who is three wanted his nails done too in all colors of the rainbow - I didn't even hesitate to paint them. Why would I deny putting bright colors on his toes? Just because he is a boy? That's so silly. He loves it & so do I. My husband & his friends maybe not so much but the point is - it's toes & it's color, they go together! Kudos!
- Amy Wednesday - 22 / 08 / 2012 Reply
  
  Good for you, Crystal!! I have a girly-girl daughter and a tomboyish daughter and there is no way I would ever try to change either of them. They are who they are, and teaching them to be themselves no matter what people might say to them, is something that will help them their entire life. My 10 year old nephew has both ears pierced, wears pink barbell earrings, heck he even has a jewellery box to keep his earrings in. He marches to the beat of his own drum and doesn't care if people don't like it. I admire his confidence. At 10 years old, he is 100 times more confident than I was at 20 years old. Society has come a long way in accepting people's differences. I hope it contines. I would hate for a child's expression to be stifled because someone else can't handle it.
  - Crystal M Wednesday - 22 / 08 / 2012 Reply
    
    I couldn't agree more Amy! Feeling confident in who you are and what you like is so important and something to instill into a child early by letting them be who they are and loving them for just that!
- Crystal M Wednesday - 22 / 08 / 2012 Reply
  
  Thanks Karen, I agree! It is only paint, what harm is it really!?
Nina Wednesday - 22 / 08 / 2012 Reply

I think it's totally fine, they will figure out what they like and don't like whether we try to influence or not. Getting hand-me-downs has Owen riding a pink and white bike and Anna with a blue cuddly in her bed. I think it is silly to have such strong gender appropriate things for babies/ toddlers, who cares!!!
- Crystal M Wednesday - 22 / 08 / 2012 Reply
  
  Thanks Nina! I totally agree! :)
Erin
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Wednesday - 22 / 08 / 2012 Reply

Great post Crystal! I find myself always gravitating toward the girly toys for Willow and I often stop myself and say, "What does she LIKE?" rather than just go with what society says are girl toys vs boy toys. You're an awesome momma! xo
- Crystal M Thursday - 23 / 08 / 2012 Reply
  
  Thanks Erin! :) xo
Kristen Friday - 28 / 09 / 2012 Reply

I LOVE this post! My son (18 moths) doesn't have an older sister so doesn't really have that influence but I find he still likes "girly" things. This summer he saw his older cousins wearing the headbands and found one of the floor and wanted to put it on. He wore it with such pride! I also found my old cabage patch doll and gave it to him and he loves it. He also loves playing with trucks and destroying towers of blocks. I think it's great to move away from labels and just let kids be kids, however they want to be!
- Crystal Saturday - 29 / 09 / 2012 Reply
  
  Thanks Kristen for your feedback, and totally agree! Kids should be able to be/act how they wish without societies glare!

My Son Wears Headbands, So What?

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